Daughters,
This message is more for me than you two. I hope that I am rewriting and rewiring your lives in what should look like the new message of giving your best instead of your all. This is coming from a place where I am having to relearn what I thought was true. I have always given my all to things in life, and sometimes to even things or people that weren’t for me. In fact about four years ago, almost five now, I was in the middle of giving my all when my body and life decided that I could no longer handle the all. I suddenly found myself dealing with so many traumas at once (a cancer diagnosis, strained relationship with a family member, and a failed friendship; no biggie) paired with Postpartum anxiety and a newborn -leaving me with depression and as a martyr. Needless to say, I had to face it “all” and finally admit to myself that I couldn’t do it all! I had to stop being a sacrificial lamb, get off the ride, and really stop pleasing my way through life. And I have been working on myself ever since.
I deeply hope for you both that it doesn’t take losing your self and literally falling apart to wake up and take care of yourself!
My mind is so wrapped up in being this perfect human, that I am still constantly having to tell myself that things are different now. What I want for myself is to give my best each day and to learn from when I fall short; and I especially want the same for my daughters.
Now, when my anxiety starts to creep back in and threaten to take over, I look inward and find what my body and self needs most. I still have a tendency to want to do all the things for everyone, but then I’m brought back to reality and reminded that boundaries and breaks are a great thing. And let’s face it, giving my all instead of my best leaves me resentful.
May you both continue to grow and realize too that giving your best is what is actually needed in order to thrive,
Mom
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