The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the economy, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.
-Albert Ellis
Daughters,
I promise that this is a real quote! And it's true! As much as there will be plenty to blame me for I'm sure, you'll soon figure out that you are in charge of your life and how you respond to your problems or even the world's problems. In the meantime, I will guide you and teach you the best that I can. This quote means so much to me because I have a feeling that society makes you believe otherwise. We all want to believe otherwise. I felt like this was important to include here and continue the conversation from yesterday.
You'll notice how easy it is to complain and blame other people. It's second nature to react to anything that doesn't go right in that way. In my experience, it is also really easy to group problems together and to fall into a victim mode right away. I'm a little ashamed to admit this, but even into my thirties I have a tendency to do that. It's easy for me to stack the evidence against what I am going through- "This always happens to me," or "It must be me; something is wrong with me." Sure, I may spend less time in blaming other people mode, but instead of making me a saint, it means that I am really hard on myself. This isn't any better!
It's hard to even picture what you each may go through in the years to come. There will be moments when I will try to fix your problems or share the collective pain. But here's the rational me talking, even if I have had a similar experience in my own life, it will never be exactly what you are feeling and experiencing. The life that I lived as a child is gone. And not only that, you are your own person. I will try my very best to not "mother" my way into your problems. If I am sharing my own experience, it isnt to compare or make it all about me. Know that my intentions are always for you to feel less alone. I will always try and make you feel less alone.
You are in control of your own destiny, and I am right here alongside of you-
Mom
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